Category: Comedy

White Australians Sign Blanket Confession

JANUARY 1, 2020. CANBERRA: White Australians have followed their South African counterparts ten years to the day, by offering to sign a blanket confession, accepting blame for all current and future setbacks in the country, from non-delivery by Australia’s first all Indigenous Federal Government, the Aboriginal National Congress (ANC) to European athletics officials doing gender tests, in the interests of more efficient government and to save precious time and tax money being wasted on paranoid racist witch-hunts.

The decision follows the latest statements by government, implying that White Australians were racist for not going to Mabo International Airport to cheer …

Scientists Discover New Element, the Heaviest Yet Known to Science: Governmentium (satire)

by Mike Adams, the Health Ranger, December 18, 2008
Key concepts: Atomic physics, Government and Bureaucratic waste

The following report on a major scientific discovery is making the rounds on the ‘net. The original author is unknown, so we don’t know who to credit for this, but it was most likely written by someone working for the government while ON the government clock!

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass …

A Message from the Federal Treasurer

A SUMMARY OF THE RECENT BUDGET

The Australian federal government is sending each and every one of you a $900 rebate.

If you spend that money at K-Mart, the money will go to China.

If you spend it on petrol it will go to the Arabs.

If we purchase a computer it will go to Taiwan.

If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.

If you purchase a good car it will go to Japan or Germany.

If you purchase useless crap it will go to China or Korea.

None of this will help …

Prejudice

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prejudice

Definition
The word prejudice refers to prejudgment: making a decision before becoming aware of the relevant facts of a case or event. The word has commonly been used in certain restricted contexts, in the expression ‘racial prejudice’. Initially this referred to making a judgment about a person based on their race, before receiving information relevant to the particular issue on which a judgment was being made; it came, however, to be widely used to refer to any hostile attitude towards people based on their race. Subsequently the word has come to be widely so interpreted in this way in …

The Goodies – South Africa

More from YouTube

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Africa_(Goodies_episode)

Synopsis
South Africa is an episode of the British comedy television series The Goodies.
This episode is also known as “Apartheight” and as “A South African Adventure”.

The Goodies make an advertisement for South Africa. However, the South African Tourist Agent is unhappy with what they have done.

The enraged agent forces the Goodies to emigrate to South Africa, where the old segregation of apartheid is replaced by the new segregation of apartheight (apart-height). Tim and Graeme are tall enough not to be affected — but Bill is not quite tall enough. Bill, and the …