Jokes

[Nick2019]

Why is the Afghan air force so easy to train?
You only have to teach them how to take off!

What do you call a guy with his hand up a camels ass?
An Afghani mechanic!

Have you heard about the Chinese retard?
Her parents named her Sum Ting Wong.

How do chincs come up with names for their kids?
By throwing silverware down the stairs and it goes ping, ching, pong, That's what they name their kids.

What do you call a gook with one testicle?
Whatwentwong.

Why did the Romans make straight roads?
So Asians couldn't build corner shops!

How do you keep an indian out of your back yard?
Move the trash cans to the front.

What do you call a white man surrounded by twenty five indians?
You call him bartender!

How do you keep Indians out of your neighborhood?
Keep a liquor store between your house and the reservation.

When's the only time you wink and smile at a nigger?
Through the scope.

What was so bad about being a black Jew?
You had to sit in the back of the oven.

How does hitler's moped sound?
Runnnn nigger nigger nigger, runnnn nigger nigger nigger

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza?
A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

Why did Hitler kill himself?
Because he saw his gas bill.

What's Hitlers least favorite planet?
'Jewpiter'

How was copper wire invented?
2 Jews fighting over the same penny

What language does Jewish homo speak?
Heblew

Why did the Jews walk around the desert for 40 years?
They heard that someone dropped a quarter

What happens when a Jew with an errection walks into a wall?
He breaks his nose.

Why are Synagogue's circular?
So the jews cant hide in the corner when the collection plate comes around!

Why do all niggers smell?
So even the blind people can hate them.

Why do lions in Africa lick their assholes?
To get the taste of nigger out of their mouth.

What do you call 20,000 niggers floating in the sea?
An oil spill.

Why does aspirin have cotton in the top?
To remind the niggers they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers

How do you find a nigger at night?
Tell the motherfucker to smile

What do you do when you see a nigger crawling across your front lawn bleeding to death?
Stop laughing and RE-LOAD!!!!!!

I like black people . . .
. . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!

Why do black people have white hands?
Everyone has some good in them!

Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter?
They're easier to spot!

What happened to the nigger who had an abortion?
Crime Stoppers sent her a check for $500!

Why don't sharks eat niggers?
They think its whale shit!

What does NAACP stand for?
Now Apes Are Called People

Why did God give niggers big dicks?
As a way to say "sorry" for putting pubes on their heads!

Why do niggers wear wide brimmed hats?
So birds won't shit on their lips!

Why was white chocolate invented?
So nigger kids could get messy too!

What do you call a nigger having sex?
Rape!

How do you get a nigger out of a tree?
Cut the rope!

What do you call 60,000 niggers on a plane heading back to Africa?
A good start!

What did God say when he made the first nigger?
Oops! Burnt another one!

Why haven't any niggers died from West Nile virus?
Mosquitos don't land on shit, only flies do!

Why is a nigger like a vending machine?
Neither work, but they both take your money!

Why was the nigger with diarrea freaking out?
He thought he was melting!

Why are there only 2 pall bearer at a niggers funeral?
A garbage can only has two handles!

Why shouldn't you throw rocks at a nigger driving by?
It could be your car!

What's long, dark and stinks?
The unemployment line!

A woman meets a black guy and invites him back to her place. She handcuffs herself to the bed and screams...
"Do what you black men do best!". The nigger grabs the TV and runs!

What's blue and hangs in my front yard?
My nigger! I'll paint him whatever color I want!

What's the difference between a nigger and a letter?
You can send the letter back where it came from!

What do you call a bunch of niggers neck-deep in mud?
Afro-turf

What do you call a bunch of niggers skydiving?
Air pollution!

What does NAACP stand for?
Niggers Are Always Causing Problems.

How do you keep a nigger from drowning?
Take your boot off his head.

What do you say to a black man in court?
Will the defendant please rise!

What do you call a black man in high school?
Janitor

Whats the difference between a nigger and a bucket of shit?
The bucket.

What do an apple and a nigger have in common?
They both belong hanging in trees.

What do you call seven niggers hanging in a tree?
A windchime.

What are three things you can't give a nigger?
A fat lip, a black eye and a job!

I had a nigger in my family tree . . .
. . . he's still hanging there!

How long does it take a nigress to take a shit?
9 months

What does a nigger and sperm have in common?
Only about 1 out of two million actually work.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a nigger?
A pizza can feed a family of four.

Why don't niggers dream?
The last one to have a dream got shot.

A nigger and a spic fall from a tree, who hits the ground first?
The spic, the nigger never makes it because he's stopped by the rope.

There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night.
I had to shoot him before he stole everything.

Whats black and brown and looks good on a nigger?
A rotwheiler!

What do you call 1 million nigger on the moon?
Eclipse...

This little niglet boy asked his dad, "Dad, I have the biggest dick in the third grade. Is it because I'm black?"
The dad replied "No you dumb nigger, it's because you're 17!"

Why can't black babies play in the sand box?
Because cats keep covering them up!

What starts with "N", ends with "R", and is a word you never want to call a black?
Neighbor!

A nigger walks into a bar with a duck on his shoulder. Bartender says, "Hey, cool, where did you get that?" Duck says, "Africa,
they are all over the fucking place."

[Lupul Daciei]

Why do Jews refuse to give their wives oral sex?

Because it's too close to the gas-chamber.

[Mikey]

what do you call a white muslim? a sand wigger
I just made that up

[Jim]

lots of damn good jokes

[Lupul Daciei]

TRUE STORY:

A noted psychiatrist was a guest speaker at an academic function where Nancy Pelosi happened to appear. Ms Pelosi took the opportunity to schmooze the good doctor a bit and asked him a question with which he was most at ease.

'Would you mind telling me, Doctor,' she asked, 'how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?'

'Nothing is easier,' he replied. 'You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If the person hesitates, that puts you on the track..'

'What sort of question?' asked Pelosi.

Well, you might ask, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?''

Pelosi thought a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, 'You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history.'