As many of you know Reverend Billy (Creator Forum Profile Link) and I were both soldiers. We first met on a joint exercise with the Australian and US Armies called Kangaroo. Kangaroo exercises in my time (the 80's) were held in North Queensland just outside of a town called Rockhampton (just ask Reverend Shaun - Creator Forum Profile Link - about that area) in the Downunder Tropics.
Anyway, one day while I was on leave, I entered a bar looking for a cold beer, when I spied a little man no more than 30 centimetres/a foot tall playing a tiny little piano. "That's amazing!" I said and asked where did such a fellow come from. The barman gave me my drink and pointed me to a corner where sat a US Army Ranger Sergeant in walking out dress covered in battled ribbons sipping at an almost empty glass of Guinness stout. It was Billy and he agreed to tell me the secret of the 30 centimetre piano player if I bought him another drink.
So I bought him another drink and he proceeded to tell me his secret. While on a mission in Central America kidnapping an American drug baron to take back to the United States to face a trial, he had stumbled across an ancient Aztec ritual site and found a tiny little clay urn just big enough to fit in his pocket. Billy, thinking that it must have been fortuitous for that urn to have survived so many hundreds of years after the fall of the Aztec Empire, kept it with him from then on as a good luck memento. Some time later, he found himself in the bar where I met him and he pulled out the the miniature urn. Thinking it was filthy and needed a clean, he pulled out his handkerchief and was giving it a thorough wipe down when a genie dressed as a Mexican Bandito appeared from nowhere!
"Hola!" said the genie. "You have one wish and only one wish. What is your wish, Señor Blanco?"
Billy then told me how he, still reeling from the shock, wished for the first thing that popped into his mind. "Si Señor Blanco!" said the genie, and sure enough, from nothing at all popped a 30 centimetre tall piano player complete with a tiny piano.
"Amazing!" I said. "Will it work for me?" After taking another sip of his Guinness, Billy silently placed the ancient Aztec miniature urn on the table and told me to give it a try, but not to expect anything.
I seized the urn with anticipation of gold and riches, but being an eighteen year old soldier I knew what I really wanted. I whipped out my handkerchief and began polishing that tiny urn like my life depended on it, when suddenly the Mexican genie appeared just as Billy had told me. "Hola!" said the genie. "You have one wish and only one wish. What is your wish, Señor Blanco?"
"Yes," said I. And I told the genie my wish.
"Si Señor Blanco," said the genie and he waved his hands in the air in a complex pattern and suddenly, a thousand ducks came flying through the door of the bar coming to roost on every perch, and every nook and cranny in the pub.
I turned to the genie and said, "WTF are you? Deaf or what? I didn't wish for a thousand Ducks!"
Whereupon Billy looking up from his drink, and declared in a slow but distinctly angry, and room encompassing Southern accent, "And I didn't wish for no 12 inch pianist neither!"
@Cailen.[/size][/font]
Anyway, one day while I was on leave, I entered a bar looking for a cold beer, when I spied a little man no more than 30 centimetres/a foot tall playing a tiny little piano. "That's amazing!" I said and asked where did such a fellow come from. The barman gave me my drink and pointed me to a corner where sat a US Army Ranger Sergeant in walking out dress covered in battled ribbons sipping at an almost empty glass of Guinness stout. It was Billy and he agreed to tell me the secret of the 30 centimetre piano player if I bought him another drink.
So I bought him another drink and he proceeded to tell me his secret. While on a mission in Central America kidnapping an American drug baron to take back to the United States to face a trial, he had stumbled across an ancient Aztec ritual site and found a tiny little clay urn just big enough to fit in his pocket. Billy, thinking that it must have been fortuitous for that urn to have survived so many hundreds of years after the fall of the Aztec Empire, kept it with him from then on as a good luck memento. Some time later, he found himself in the bar where I met him and he pulled out the the miniature urn. Thinking it was filthy and needed a clean, he pulled out his handkerchief and was giving it a thorough wipe down when a genie dressed as a Mexican Bandito appeared from nowhere!
"Hola!" said the genie. "You have one wish and only one wish. What is your wish, Señor Blanco?"
Billy then told me how he, still reeling from the shock, wished for the first thing that popped into his mind. "Si Señor Blanco!" said the genie, and sure enough, from nothing at all popped a 30 centimetre tall piano player complete with a tiny piano.
"Amazing!" I said. "Will it work for me?" After taking another sip of his Guinness, Billy silently placed the ancient Aztec miniature urn on the table and told me to give it a try, but not to expect anything.
I seized the urn with anticipation of gold and riches, but being an eighteen year old soldier I knew what I really wanted. I whipped out my handkerchief and began polishing that tiny urn like my life depended on it, when suddenly the Mexican genie appeared just as Billy had told me. "Hola!" said the genie. "You have one wish and only one wish. What is your wish, Señor Blanco?"
"Yes," said I. And I told the genie my wish.
"Si Señor Blanco," said the genie and he waved his hands in the air in a complex pattern and suddenly, a thousand ducks came flying through the door of the bar coming to roost on every perch, and every nook and cranny in the pub.
I turned to the genie and said, "WTF are you? Deaf or what? I didn't wish for a thousand Ducks!"
Whereupon Billy looking up from his drink, and declared in a slow but distinctly angry, and room encompassing Southern accent, "And I didn't wish for no 12 inch pianist neither!"
@Cailen.[/size][/font]







