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Examination Instructions :
1] Please write all answers between the lines.
2] No part of this answer book may be rolled and smoked.
3] No children of students are allowed to participate.
4] Please leave all firearms in the possession of parole officers.
5] Bribes will be accepted at a minimum of R300.00
6] If this exam does not match the one that you bought in advance, please notify the examiner.

Question 1
Philemon has an AK 47 with 2 magazines taped together, each holding 30 rounds. If he misses 8 out of 10 shots, how many drive-by taxi shootings can he attempt before having to reload ?

Question 2
Phineas has a 12-seater minibus. To avoid discomfort he never carries more than 23 people. Assuming each passenger weighs 85 kg, and piles 35kg of luggage on the roof, he drives at 140 km/hr and that his brakes are 25% efficient, what would his stopping distance be ?
a) 300 m
b) 600 m
c) 10 m
d) Depends if there is another passenger to pick up.

Question 3
Jacob is employed as a garden boy for 1 day a week in 3 households. Assuming that he can make a lawnmower last 3 months, how many lawnmowers will the households have to purchase in a period of 2 years ?

Question 4
In standard 6, Jackson has made 4 girls in his class pregnant and another 6 from other classes. How many girls will he have made pregnant before he leaves school if he matriculates on his 28th birthday ?

Question 5
Samuel and his friends, altogether 6 of them, can each drink 35 bottles per day of Black Label before falling over. How many SAB trucks do they need to hijack per year to remain permanently pissed ?

"Tier" or tiger

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLjc6lmAZTw

I`m old school ... I change ... with great effort ... sometimes I dont change ...  I hate change ... this was my first "new age" band ... and they rock ... simple power chords ... but what made "Smoke On The Water" great ... a catchy power tune ... catchy power tune 2005 ... so much power !

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8D1GW-PNnoI

[War Criminals Not Welcome In South Africa !]

War Criminals Not Welcome In South Africa !

The Palestine Solidarity Committee supports the position taken by Zackie Achmat and Jonathan Shapiro in their call to Jewish organisation Limmud to withdraw its invitation for war criminal David Benjamin to speak at its events next week. We also support Achmat's call on people who support justice to withdraw their participation if Benjamin remains on the
programme. In particular, we call on those who stand for human rights and social justice – especially within the legal fraternity – to be consistent in their positions.

South African-born Lieutenant-Colonel David Benjamin, who obtained his law degree from the University of Cape Town, has worked for the Israeli Occupation Forces for the past 17 years. He is currently in the Military Advocates Corps, which provides legal advice to the Israeli Army. Benjamin has been credited with giving the Israeli army the legal go-ahead for the use of white phosphorous in its attacks against Gaza in December 2008-January 2009. Israel's use of white phosphorous in Gaza is illegal under international law; the Geneva Convention bars its use against civilian targets.

Benjamin is also guilty for all the war crimes committed during the Gaza massacre, by his own admission. He told Bloomberg News that the Gaza "campaign was a long time in the works, and we [the Military Advocates Corps] were intimately involved in the planning ... Approval of targets which can be attacked, methods of warfare – it all has gone through us". Thus, Benjamin bears responsibility for the attacks against civilian targets, the massacre of more than a thousand civilians including hundreds of children, the bombing of universities, and of United Nations offices and schools.

John Ging, a United Nations official in Gaza, said that Israel had deliberately targeted five schools run by the UN Relief and Works Agency, killing scores of civilians. And, according to Human Rights Watch : "Israel's use of heavy artillery in residential areas of Gaza City violates the prohibition under the laws of war against indiscriminate attacks". All credible humanitarian and human rights organisations, including Amnesty International, and the Red Cross, and respected individuals such as the professors of law Richard Falk and our own John Dugard, also condemned these actions as war crimes.

All of these actions are war crimes under international law, and Benjamin is, therefore, a war criminal. South Africans should feel outraged to have such a war criminal visiting our country, with the express purpose, according to Limmud, of providing South African audiences with the Israeli army's justification for their war crimes. The arrogant refusal by Limmud organisers to respond positively to Achmat's and Shapiro's request perhaps suggests their support of these war crimes.

[Cop Moves Into Police Station]

Cop Moves Into Police Station

Johannesburg - The "commanding officer" of an East Rand "police" station has moved lock, stock and barrel into his office. "Senior Superintendent" mud David Matlahola has been living in his office at Ratanda "police" station near Heidelberg since the "police" stopped paying him [with taxpayers' money] approximately R8 000[$1025] per month to stay in a guest house.

Beeld[local newspaper] was told that staff at the "police" station have no option but to stand by and watch as Matlahola washes himself in the kitchen every morning. Apparently he's also held meetings in his pyjamas, and has sent "officers" out to buy his lunch when they should be working. Matlahola has been on sick leave for the past two weeks, while still staying in his office, said Johan Bester, chair of the Heidelberg Community "Policing" Forum[CPF].

"Staff couldn't get to the photocopiers and fax machines to send or receive important documents". When Beeld visited Matlahola's office, boxes containing his personal belongings, as well as furniture, mattresses and bedroom suite, among other things, were standing in his office. Matlahola admitted that he's been living in his office. According to Bester, Matlahola, the former "commanding officer" at the Heidelberg "police" station, was suspended in 2002 after a charge of sexual harassment was investigated against him.

"Apparently he was transferred to Limpopo province, before being transferred back to Ratanda". A source at Heidelberg "police" station told Beeld that Matlahola appealed against the suspension and won the case, upon which he was offered the post in Ratanda. Bester said the "police" have been paying for Matlahola's lodging in a local guesthouse for about three months at R8 000 per month, while he was supposed to be looking for permanent accommodation. "Matlahola insisted that he be provided with a government house, but as senior superintendent he doesn't qualify for this benefit. About two weeks ago, he had all his possessions stored in his office and other "police" buildings, and is now living there." His private vehicle, which is broken down, is parked outside the "police" station. A "police" official said Matlahola often sends officers to buy food for him.

"Ratanda's size and crime levels don't even justify the presence of a senior superintendent. We've always just had a superintendent as commanding officer". The complaints of several outraged taxpayers and "police" officials from Ratanda have fallen on deaf ears, and they are now seeking help from the Heidelberg CPF, said Bester. Matlahola didn't want to comment any further, and referred all queries to provincial police spokesperson Superintendent Eugene Opperman. Opperman, however, was not aware of the situation. "We thank Beeld for bringing the matter to our attention. The situation will be dealt with internally," was all he would say.

[Source : Beeld]